I love writing this blog (and I hope people enjoy reading it) so I wanted to write something yesterday. However, yesterday was one of those days where you feel completely unreasonable & your good mood is incredibly flimsy & the smallest thing can set it off. For instance, although I woke up a bit like this:
I was still having a great day. However I had my last counselling session that day and was feeling pretty nervous about it, because, I didn’t feel like talking, my social anxiety was having a great time running rampant in my head, and I didn’t really feel like talking to humans. Because I was so nervous about it my anxious-ness was trying to find something else to fixate on; I didn’t exactly notice how flimsy my good mood was until I dropped a chip at lunch and had the slightly unreasonable reaction when I watched it fall of:
causing my good mood to turn more sort of:
whilst I was mourning the loss of the chip. This, coupled with the fact that I was doing my best to ignore the bitchy-ness of the housemates
even though I said hi to them and they completely ignored me how RUDE is that and I wasn’t going to let it get to me
all meant that by the time I got back from counselling I was in this sort of state:
As of next week, on the 7th May, I am going to be 21 years old. So, being a mature and responsible almost-adult, I did the mature and responsible thing to deal with all this- I got into bed with my electric blanket and had a nap. Misjudging it slightly and waking up hours later with no idea where I was or what was going on and feeling like the apocalypse must have happened while I was asleep.
The nap worked though!